31. Shorts

By Don

Romanian Drivers

Well, they seem about on par with the non-Hungarian countries we have travelled through. Normally they wait until it is safe to pass. On the odd occasion when they don’t we curse them “you damn Hungarian driver”. Bad drivers by definition are now all Hungarian. Not fair? Well life is so much easier if you just throw an identifiable group of people (bad drivers in the case) into a stereo type and apply derogatory comments to them. Facts, figures and logic just get in the way of simplicity. Cognitive efficiencies so to speak. We can’t, or at least shouldn’t do that you say? Well if it is good enough for the President of the United States it is good enough for us.

Come On, Let’s See What You’ve Got

One of the things about riding in Romania is the dogs. They like to chase you. Now we had been forewarned about this and have brought some loud whistles having been told that scares them off. It doesn’t. Sue had said just stop and get off the bike and they will go home. I think that takes a lot of nerve when two dogs are barking and growling at your heels, but Dennis tried it and it worked. Me, not yet, but I’m working on my nerve. My preferred approach is to speed up as fast as I can go and say to them, “Come on, let’s see what you’ve got.” The only catch with this is the pavement needs to be smooth and the road flat, or better slightly downhill. But then it is oh so rewarding. You just keep going until the dog wheezes himself off the road.

As an aside most of them just like to bark and chase you, that’s why stopping works. The biggest issue is when you don’t see them coming and all of a sudden they are right there and start barking. In this case they scare the shit out of you. They then go rollicking home chatting with each other, “Jesus, did you see that guy? I think he wet himself. God that was funny, oh look, here comes the other, lets hide over here.”

Chocolat

Have you seen the movie? Johnny Depp plays a Roma gypsy camped outside of Paris. In the movie, as I recall it, the gypsies can all play instruments, they know how to have fun and they cook and eat interesting food. And some of them look like Johnny Depp. Romantic, talented, fun loving group.

Well we have cycled through a few Roma villages. It isn’t pretty, it isn’t romantic and I doubt there is a musical instrument to be found. It is just plain old poverty.

Romania

Ok, for this one first listen to THIS. Now you may have to skip an ad to hear it but go on. Of course it will bring back memories and you will go off get your record collection from the 70’s start listening to it and forget about this blog. Lucky you.

Let us be travellers, we’ll visit Europa together
I’ve got some Euros here in my bag
So we bought a couple of panniers and GPS apps for our phone
And we cycled off to look for Romania
Dennis,  I said as we crossed the border to Hungary
Slovakia seems like a dream to me now
It took us 12 days to cycle through Poland
We’ve come to look for Romania

Joking as we rode, playing games with the faces
He said the man with a scowl was a Pole
I said I doubt it he’s likely Estonian
Toss me a Mars bar, I think there’s one in my pannier
You ate the last one an hour ago
So I bitched about the head wind
And he about the climb
And the road rose over a mountain pass

Dennis, we’re lost, I said, though I knew he was dreaming
And I’m hungry and tired and the Nav screen is blank
He’s talking to cows on the side of the highway *
Who don’t know know what is Romania
But we’ve come to look for Romania
Let’s all come to look for Romania

*Yes, Dennis is a regular Dr. Dolittle.